just shit that haunts me.

It was warm out and the sun was slipping between the blinds in his living room.
We were cuddled up on his futon watching a movie; that seemed to be our nightly routine.
I can't even remember what movie it was or the clothing I was wearing, but I do remember the look on his face and the nervous shake in my voice. I dont think i practiced what i was going to say to him and I believe I surprised myself more when I heard the words.
I remember stumbling on my words and just half listening to his words. I keep staring at his face and feeling my cheeks rise. I couldn't stare at him without a smile.I couldn't lay next to him and keep my hands to myself. I knew there was a tinkle in my eye and I liked it.
I was laying in this comfort zone, i was comfy and I felt so safe. My brain might of been running slow but my heart was right on track. My heart felt every stare, every kiss and loving word.I knew I had to tell him, it was pounding in my chest. I looked at him and broke the silence stumbled on my words and tried to explain what i was feeling inside. But no words could justify the butterflies in my stomach.
I thought my attempted was horrible,my sentences were crumbling.I can't remember the exact words, i know i probably didn't make much sense, but in the end i said what i needed to say.The only 3 words that mattered.He look honored and shocked.I know the words stunned his thoughts. We were both silent and i buried my head into his shoulder,not because i regretted my words, but because maybe he wasn't feeling the same. I watched his eyes and I could tell he was trying to place his words carefully. He didn't want to sting me with the wrong words. He explained that he didn't want to say something he didn't mean and he cared for me alot.But had to be sure. I respected his view and I agreed.It didn't hurt, it was smart!

Days later we were laying in the guest bedroom at his parents house.He told me he had to tell me something but he was silent.We laid there in the dark, with the soft sounds of his voice. I could hear the small break across his face. And I urged him to speak up, deep inside I knew the exact words he was about to say.I am embarrassed to admit that tears welled up in my eyes as he pronouced he loved me. The words trickled off his tongue, bumpy but clear. He never felt so happy and content. I was someone he felt comfortable with and he loved me.That special night changed me forever, its locked deep in my heart.

I found this saved in my documents from like 2 years ago.