Feeling alittle PINK

I am beginning to notice myself in the mirror again. There isn't a faint waste of color smeared across the frame. The zipper in my pants broke, i don't know if it's because I'm fat or if its because well, im fatter.Its like weeks go by and I only realize whats going on way after it happened. My nails have grown and Im fairly proud of that.I painted them red and I felt mature.How a paint colored on my nails can make me feel more mature is beyond me. But I'll accept it. I stood in the line up at the grocery store and I chipped away at the nail polish, I was bored of standing in the same spot. I walk towards the door and notice a women examining me and I wonder if she can see the stray hairs around my eyebrows. They really need to be plucked. I feel naked. I brush my teeth with my tongue. What is she staring at? I walk away catching her eyes on purpose. I cut my hair the other day, its a lot shorter. And I thought about "him", I was scared I would now be ugly. Because I remember he once told me he didn't like girls with short hair. He said his ex chopped off her long hair and he wasn't as attracted to her. I was terrified to cut my hair when I was with him. And now every time I cut it short and I don't even mean short, I mean anything above my collarbone I wonder. Would he still think I was pretty? Its weird how one persons thoughts or opinions can really make you feel ugly. Even if its just for second, its really a low feeling.