Laura (my youngest sister) has now jumped on the bandwagon. Her and Jessika both feel superior because they have boyfriends. And because I am single therefore I am jealous. First of all I rarely get jealous, its just not an emotion I contain. I was happy for Laura, excited when I found out her and Brad got together. And now she walks around likes she's Queen, looking down on me. Maybe she should concentrate on her life and relationship and not worry about me.
I never even say things to make myself look jealous. And if I do say something its just the truth.I suppose the sayings right, truth hurts.
All I said to Laura the other night was in responds to what to get Brad for V-day. I told her too many people go all out buying presents like its Christmas. I said it shouldn't be about the presents. She snaps at me "Your just jealous because you don't have a boyfriend." What the hell? I am flabbergasted everytime they say that to me. Someone has brain washed them. You don't need a boyfriend to complete you or make you happy. And maybe part of me wants to prove that. At this point I want left out of there relationships, because I don't need to but put down for whatever motive they have. Obviously it makes them feel better about themselves and there relationship.Or I hit a nerve with them in whatever I say. But there relationships leave little to be jealous about. And I suppose saying that makes me sound jealous. Thats there only defense. If they are happy, thats wonderful, but don' t think I am going to settle. I don't want OK, or just happy, or cute. I want it all, and more.
I now know why I rather be alone, because I can't deal with other peoples bullshit anymore. I feel like just leaving, running away, being alone. No more stories, put downs and screwed up lives. No more difficult friends, who I have to beg to hang out with or make plans and cancel at the drop of a hat. Just me, completely me. Sort of scary, but less of a headache.
I can pretend like it doesn't hurt, but it does. Knowing that my sisters pity me and look down on me because of my dating status.
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2 comments:
Hey now, no need to get down that you don't have a boyfriend. I myself am single and enjoy life without a girlfriend. I guess it's because I like to do things on my terms and hate relying on someone for emotional support (or something like that!)
They say what they do because they're happy but wait until things get bad (ie. fights or worse, break ups) they'll realize that a relationship can be very stressful and emotionally draining.
But don't take my word for it. Think of the times you've been in a relationship and how things were when they were bad.
Also, finally, I find people who need boyfriends/girlfriends to make them feel like kings/queens are very insecure of themselves.
But hey, that's just me.
;)
Im not down because Im single.. it bugs me that people aka my sisters feel better than me because they have one. I am content and happy with myself. And Im getting annoyed with the stuff they say to me.
But thanks for reassuring me
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